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Kizer the Kindly Dog: Unconditional Love

“Please take me home. I don’t eat much. I’m a real walker, all the way from Kentucky. Please…. I won’t bother you ever, ever, ever. I’ll sleep on the couch and I’ll look out the windows. I’m a good boy. I promise.” Thus was my introduction to Kizer the Kindly dog.

Kizer came to me as a rescue after our beagle Scout passed over the rainbow bridge.

I was pretty distraught and I told Melissa that we should get another dog. Melissa was supportive, but she was in the wait and see mode. Being the good husband that I am, I waited. Four days. After that ninety-six-hour eternity I showed up at the animal shelter.We transported Kizer to our house next to the tree farm and walked him through the back garage door. I think Kizer forgot he was from Kentucky and pretended he was an Egyptian, because the first thing he did was act like a Pharoh, toddle into the living room and leave us a 7-inch-high pyramid.

I still haven’t figured out who got saved that day. The shelter helper brought a skinny, waggy, Beagle Terrier into the meet and greet room and when his brown eyes met mine let’s just say “Love is a many splendored thing”. Quiet, bashful, skittish, and shy; Kizer looked at me, I looked at him, and he decided to buy him a man. Five sniffs, a tongue kiss and six tail wangs said more than a Hemingway book could ever express. Evidently, I passed Kizer job interview. I became his forever man.

It took Kizer about a week to figure out that we might just turn out to be a good all the time family. I mean peanut butter bones, run of the house and hand feeding probably helped as well. Kizer had it all figured out, so howled it out “Hey I got a good thing going here. Warm treats, four bedrooms, yup, this is the bachelor pad I was dreaming about. Not to mention all the rabbits I can chase! What’s not to like?”

Our brown and tan crazy man settled in so nicely that we took him to puppy school. He turned out to be a social butterfly who simply couldn’t stop talking. He made friends with a Lucy A. Lab who chased him despite the puppy trainer’s reminders. There’s nothing like first love. Kizer learned to heal and sit right next to the peanut butter jar that I held in my hand. Eventually pooper got the idea, “I behave, I lick PB.” By now the trainer had a suggestion for me, “Maybe you should see if Kizer can behave without his nose buried in your peanut butter jar all the time.” The trainer’s wisdom worked completely well. Kizer taught me “ I Kizer, you treat giver. “I work for food.” He wasn’t even wearing a sign!

Who, exactly, is this Kindly Kizer? See if you can figure it out. He loves the car the way Romeo loves Juliet. His rides are adventures, especially when the windows are open, his head is halfway out and his ears are F 18 wings in the breeze. This brown eyed phantom lives in four bedrooms depending on the sunlight, and keeps his tan up be napping in what ever window is most comfortable.

Our kindly Kizer lets us know when the Amazon truck arrives. The neighbors three blocks down know the Amazon truck is arriving too. Maybe these folks don’t appreciate howls in the key of B flat. Singer boy can’t keep a tune in a bag. “Mr. Friendly”, as my neighbor calls him, runs to the door, barks three times, and greets whoever it is with a jump a lick and beg for a belly rub. It doesn’t matter if I tell the guest, just knock him off” The 100% response is “He’s just being friendly.” After his jump, Kizer is an instant BFF.

Krazy Kizer is an expert snow angel maker and snow removal artist. I go to shovel, he helps by eating as much snow as he can, as fast as he can. Springtime brings him into garden helper mode. I plant, Kizer inspects, the tail wags with Kizer disdain. He digs his hole where he would rather have the new annual. Funny thing is he digs just right, 6 inches deep!

I don’t think Kizer can read, although somewhere he must have learned the Bible verse from the book of Ruth. “Where you go, I will go. Tail wag and all.”

Don’t get me wrong, Kizer gets grumpy. Wake from his mid-morning nap at your own risk. He warms the bed at night with a puppy head on my pillow. If the truth were known, he enjoys my bed enough that I generally sleep on the floor. On 40 below zero nights Kizer shares my bed with me kinda sorta. He gets the top half; I get the foot.

Kizer has me well trained regarding treats. I give him a treat, he behaves. For anybody else, he behaves, they give him a treat. Go figure. I do, however, have the last laugh because Kizer’s brain ends at the tip of his nose. I throw treats across our oak floor and he skates into the wall of the cabinet or wherever the teat ends up. It’ a good thing he has good brakes.

Kizer the Kindly Dog; friend, loyal trouble maker, sincerely soft old man. “I’m yours, no questions asked, peanut butter aside.” Unconditional love .”OOOOWWWWW”. Ther’s that Kizer two step again. “I’d better go clean my shoes.

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